Culture goes winding down (f. Wonka spokesG Nick Cannon®)

Nick Cannon,  spokesman for Nestle (formerly Anglo-Swiss Milk Company)

Nick Cannon®, spokesG for Nestle (formerly Anglo-Swiss Milk Company), "swaggin wit dem 'tarts"

Yo!  What it do?  It’s ya boy, Russ–straight mobbing in the herbarium. Herb, my G! 420!  Holla!

So I’mma holla at you about how we a culture in decline yo.

Thanks to complicity of gimmicky-ass slave-descendants like Nick Cannon®, the slave-classes can funk and fake they way to the bottom of modern-day-slavery, paving the way for other slaves to proudly fight among each other for the scraps of the elites’ table of plenty. Hell ya, mah dude!  This mah shit!

So I was chilling in the cut, doing what I do, and smoking what I smoke–you feel me? 420! Holla!  On the tele-bible comes my G Nick Cannon®, and I say to myself, “Yo! Nick Cannon® is the hottest out right now–I wonder what bullshit he be recommending that I pointlessly purchase?” Now check it: I’m my own person.  I’m an individual–part of a vast herd of individuals.  I do me.  You feel me? Holla! Still, when I found out that, like me, Nick Cannon® was raised in San Diego, I was like, “Hell nah! Is you kidding me!?”  Then I emoted other impotent chatter, trading an invigorating distraction of pathos for the frustrating reality that I am trapped, by my socially engineered bad priorities, within a culture of insane puppets who guilt and shame each other into pretending that “celebrities” matter.

So, in the video, Nick Cannon® starts dancing like a modern-minstrel-show, just without the white gloves, then he’s all, “Wassup ya’ll? Nick Cannon® here!”  And right away I’m thinking, “Damn! Nick Cannon® slurred together the words ‘what’, ‘is’ and ‘up’–so I can DEFINITELY trust him, because he does not articulate! Surely that is ‘keeping it real’.”  Then Nick Cannon® said “Nick Cannon®,” so I was certain that he was, in fact, THE Nick Cannon®–a person who matters!

To make a long story longer, slave-descendant Nick Cannon®–who matters far more to me than the people around me–starts to pitch Wonka (W)rapper. Get it? It’s a beat-maker: a (w)Rapper.  Now Nestle Company®, who owns The Willy Wonka Candy Company®–they ain’t never ever promoted they bullshit with a mainstream hip-hop puppet,  since the company’s advent after a 1905 merger of Anglo-Swiss Milk Company®.  You feel me?  Holla!  So when I saw my boy Nick Cannon® on the tele-bible, peddling slave-master’s sugary shit to a culture of physically and spiritually diabetic slaves–I was like, “This mah shit!” You feel me? 420! Holla!

Then I emoted other impotent chatter, trading an invigorating distraction of pathos for the frustrating reality that I am trapped, by my socially engineered bad priorities, within a culture of insane puppets who guilt and shame each other into pretending that “celebrities” matter.  Our culture be winding down yo!   You feel me? Holla!

“The Toys Go Winding Down” — Primus

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